Joke Time: Tawanan muna

FACELIFT

Pasyente ... magkano ang facelift?
Doktora ... complete treatment ay P145,000
Pasyente .. mahal!!! ano bang pinakamurang treatment para magmukha akong bata?
Doktora ... heto tsupon, P20 lang!!


ORDER ORDER

Customer .... waiter! bakit ang tagal ng order ko? ilan ang cook nyo dito?
Waiter ... ay, sir, wala pu kame cuk dito...pipse lang po!!


PROBLEMA NGA

Pasyente .... Doc, may problema ako...tuwing alas otso ng umaga dumudumi ako...
Doktor ... so, anong problema doon?
Pasyente ... Eh alas nuwebe po ako nagigising.


HIWALAYAN

Wife ... maghiwalay na tayo!
Man ... ok! akin ang bahay!
Wife ... Akin ang farm!
Man .. Akin ang kotse!
Wife ... Wag mo isama driver, matagal ng akin yan.
Man .. Magkakamatayan tayo! Akin siya!

CUSTOMER

A man was carrying 3 babies in a train.
Lady sitting next asked, 'are they your babies?'
Man: 'No, I work in a con - dom factory and these are customer complaints!'


ACCIDENT

A lawyer driving on a highway notices a crowd in an intersection.
With his urge to get into the thick crowd and see the action, he shouted, 'I'M THE SON OF THE VICTIM.'
Upon hearing, the people made way for him to get through.
There he saw, bloody and helpless lying in front of the people...a pig bumped by a trailer truck!


PINTURA

Erap .. Honey, nagpintura ako ng banyo.
Loi ... Bakit dalawa ang suot mong jacket, ang init - init!!!
Erap .. Sabi kasi sa label, for best results put on 2 coats.