CTALK By Cito Beltran (The Philippine Star)

First off, we were not wearing “red” when we arrived at “Mommy Anita” Tan/Sytin’s birthday.

Not being ethnic Chinese or Tsinoy even, I did not realize and forgot that “red” is the preferred color for birthday parties among our Chinese or Tsinoy friends. Too bad I didn’t realize it considering I have a couple of “red shirts” that rarely get to go out of the closet except during the cooler times of the year.

Then I was told that when a “Chinese” celebrant is marking his or her 80th birthday, guests are no longer expected or required to bring gifts because having reached 80 years old and able to actually celebrate it, is more valuable than all the material gifts combined. In fact during this particular birthday party we attended, it was the celebrant’s family handing out small red envelopes for the kids called “Ang Pao.”

As we proceeded to slowly enjoy multiple courses in the Lauriat, someone graciously explained to me that the celebrant was in fact not 80 but 79 years old. But since the Chinese add or count the “year of conception” to their age and because they consider the number 9 not an auspicious number, they skip 79 and jump from 78 to 80 the same way “westernized” cultures don’t have a thirteenth room or a thirteenth floor. I later found out from another friend that the Chinese particularly in Hong Kong are so averse to the number 4 that some if not many buildings don’t have a 4th floor.

To the traditional Chinese the number 4 sounds similar to the pronunciation of the word for “dead” or “death”. To me, it’s all numbers and superstitions but the year my Dad, Louie Beltran changed all his car plate numbers to 444 because his birthday was April 4, was also the year or there after that Martial Law was declared and led to him losing all the cars with plate number 444. Either way, whether you’re a numbers person or not, I guess it won’t hurt to avoid 4, 9’s and 13.

Fortunately I don’t have that problem this year as I turn 58 today. If anything I am thankful to God Almighty that I have been living a good second half. I’ve always maintained the view that those who’ve had a sad or lousy first half in life will get a great second half, once we allow God to sit as coach and team manager of our life. Another thing that I recently took note of and shared with my younger brother comes from the book of Deuteronomy chapter 28 verses 47 & 48:

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“Because you did not serve the Lord your God joyfully and gladly in the time of prosperity, therefore in hunger and thirst, in nakedness and dire poverty, you will serve the enemies the Lord sends against you.”

When I read this passage, it did not speak to me merely in the context of our attitude while serving but our over all attitude in life. Because we are God’s people (whatever denomination) we are quite special and quite blessed, but God knows people and he knew well in advance that some people will tend to be unappreciative of their status and focus on the difficulties rather than the reasons for celebration which is why he used Moses to warn people about being unhappy, sullen, or having no joy or gladness because it’s equal to being ungrateful.

Imagine yourself in God’s shoes, your Father watching over you as you choose to set aside, ignore or not celebrate “Life”. I know a few things that breaks a parents heart and one of them is having a child with no joy or no understanding for what is supposed to be a cause for celebration.

My brother celebrates his birthday a week ahead of me and this year he did not see much reason for celebrating especially with times being difficult and with quite a number of spending priorities. The practical and human side in us all might choose to do the same. Let the day pass quietly and just be thankful for another year. I was suddenly reminded of the passage and I read it out to him as I encouraged him to go have a meal, take a break with his kids and his wife if only to express to God his appreciation for unexpected blessings as well as his obedience.

Our joy is not measured by the size of the feast or the number of guests. I certainly believe that it’s not about numbers, lucky or otherwise. It is for the most part joyfully acknowledging God and thanking him for the privilege of life that not everybody gets to experience. It is about enjoying the company of family, very good friends, or just God if you don’t have anyone.

Today, I will be in the company of my mother Marita who gave birth to me and planted the seeds of faith in me. Today I will be with my wife Karen who has been my partner and teammate in our journey of faith with God. Today, I will be walking around our place in Lipa with my daughter Hannah my only child to whom I shall pass on the seeds of faith that my mother planted. Today, I will remember and pray for the good friends, it has been my honor and privilege to know so well, eat, laugh and share struggles with. Today we will joyfully and gladly (ob)serve and be thankful for another year and may it be a year of prosperity. Today we will say: Thank You Father God for your Blessings.

(No party, just prayers.)

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